Which Photos Will Be Used for the Slideshow of My Life? Ask St. Veronica, Patron Saint of Photographers

My blessed mother, Mary,

This Mother's Day is the first one I have spent without my mom.  I am not so sure it will ever be any less lonely for me.  There is no end to the memories that come with the day. This was the day I usually planted her vegetable garden and the flowers for her deck.  Mother's Day falls on the day that frost is no longer a concern, making planting the things she loved the perfect gift.

For years it had been too big of a job for my mother to put in a garden but eating the fresh produce was never too hard for her.  Even at 100 she could tell the difference between a garden tomato and a store bought one.  She loved freshly steamed zucchini with butter and salt and pepper.  She would eat green peppers straight from the plant like apples. She always had a sink full of cucumbers in ice water waiting to be slivered into a bowl for her famous sour cream cucumber salad.  She saved coffee cans all winter to place over the celery so it would grown long, tender, pale green stalks for her soups.  Early in the morning she could be found picking the ripe strawberries for shortcake before the birds could get them.  So many memories come to me on this day, leafing through the scrapbook of my mind. 

The Shrine of Saint Veronica

St. Veronica is the Patron Saint of Photographers.  Her fame came from wiping the sweat, mud and tears from Christ's face with her veil as he carried the cross, leaving the clearly visible imprint of his face on the cloth. They say this holy relic still exists today in Rome.  Late one night I remembered this story as I scanned and cropped the 54 photographs to be used in the 5 minute memorial slideshow of my mother's 101 years on the planet.  I recalled each event as I decided which picture to choose. A family reunion of fifteen, where now I count 5 people, some young and some old, gone.  There is the photo taken on a snowy day, in front of the log cabin, of my mom playing with her dogs.  There is a photograph, with new outfits for all, leaning against the green Plymouth, holding a new Easter purse.  My mother watching from a chair as my brother and sister-in-law plant her garden, the year I was too busy.  So many wonderful memories and some regrets, all captured in photos to be used at a funeral to describe your life in 5 minutes.  We really don't know at the time the photo is taken that it will be chosen, do we?  So now I say, look your best because this might be the one.

In the days prior to my mother's death, it was apparent she was ready to go as she gradually quit eating and drinking, her breathing labored and the blue splotches began to appear on her legs.  As I absorbed every minute with her, intently memorizing the moment, I remembered St. Veronica's veil as I blotted her face with a towel. I thought about her long life, 54 million minutes to be accurate, and the gift she gave me as my mother, seeing me into this world.  It only seemed fitting to see her out of this world, the best Mother's Day gift I could give her, although, at the time I didn't know it.

St. Veronica holding her Veil from Chris Hart Studio

The St. Veronica story is an archetype, the act of the saint is the vehicle for finding meaning in our lives.  It is to say that the simplest act of kindness is an act bigger than we can begin to understand.  A mother wipes a child's face after a meal. A husband offers a handkerchief to dry his wife's tears. A friend helps with a dustrag while you bake a birthday cake. A brother holds his sister's towel at a 10K run. A father hands you a cloth after you catch your first fish.  A daughter and mother share a dishtowel at Thanksgiving.  You wipe your mother's face in her last days.   

The simplest acts hold such great meaning.  So many photographs didn't make it into her slideshow of life but so many memories cannot be erased.  Happy Mother's Day.